Lying

At school i had a 'friend' who lied none stop about everything. He would lie every single day about anything, and would then lie even more if he was caught out to get himself out of it. He told me his mom had cancer, when she didn't, his nan was no longer alive, when she was, and that all of his family lived in Spain, when they actually lived a five minute walk away from the school. Looking back now i can't understand why i continued to hang around with him because all he ever did was bullshit me.
I have never in my life since met anyone who lied as blatantly as my mate Tim. What used to bother me the most was he had no reason to lie. If he was lying to cover up something he had done, then maybe that would be understandable, but lying for the sake of it was beyond me.

He would lie for lots of reasons: for sympathy (he must not have had any shame saying his mother had cancer), to look better than everyone else (he was one of those who had been there, done it, got the T-shirt, type of guys), for money (he was always saying his parents had kicked him out with nothing so i would borrow him bus fare), to fit in (he once said he had a new bike and agreed to meet us the one weekend but never turned up), to think of it the list is endless.
Maybe it was insecurity that made him lie, but i think he had something in his brain that the average person just does not have. He was unique in that sense and i have never met another liar of his calibre in my life.

Personally i find it hard to understand. He knew his friends would have accepted him no matter who or what he was, so why could he never tell the truth? I was discussing Tim the other day with my brother, who had seen him recently at a family wedding (his aunt has married my uncle), and even all these years later he was exactly the same bull shitter as when we were at school.
He told my brother his sister now lived in Greece (When i know she actually lives in Tipton), that he was just out of the army and had been in it since leaving school (lies because my mom saw his mom a few years ago and she said he had been out of work for nearly three years, no mention of the army), and that he has just bought a £200,000 house in Birmingham for cash (yeah, right).
So why do people like Tim go through their whole lives without changing? Again, i think its psychological and i think people like Tim have an inbuilt mechanism inside their brain that tells them to bull shit every sucker they meet. Whether or not it has something to do with his up bringing I'm not sure, but his sister never lied and shes now a normal nice person.

According to this website (entitled 14 types of people who are most likely to you) there are different kinds of liars who lie for different reasons, but looking back Tim fitted into all of these categories. He lied when jealous, to flatter you, to get money, the list is endless.
If he had a reason to lie then maybe i would understand, but he would lie about stupid stuff that simply mattered to no one. He once said he had a new dog, but when i visited his house and asked his dad where the new dog was, his dad said what dog? Tim was a total twat like that.

Lying to cover up something isn't as bad as lying just for the sake of it. However, lying to people who are meant to mean something to you like close friends or family is just wrong. People won't lie to you if they respect you (that's what I've always thought).
I think that because Tim had an upbringing where his older sister was more his mom (his parents were hardly ever in) meant that he wasn't told off for lying. So in his mind he must not see it as that bad. I mean, what sort of a person lies that their mother has cancer? He must not have felt any guilt about spreading such terrible lies.
When i was a kid if i lied i got a proper hiding, so i quickly learned that it was very wrong. I think that this is the same for most people who have a conscience. People like Tim are rare, and they take lying to the extreme but it just shows that you have to watch who you trust. All kinds of lying is wrong, especially when it hurts someone else.

The Internet is now one of the easiest ways for people to pretend they are something they are not. I can't count the number of times i have read the problem pages in newspapers where people have said they have met their ideal future partner on line, but this person refuses to meet them face to face. I just can't understand why people just can't be who they are and meet people that way. If people don't want to know you for who you really are then I've always believed that they are not worth knowing at all. People who lie online must be very insecure and not happy with their selves. I think the designer models we see on TV and all over magazines plays into peoples fears of not fitting in or being accepted. I know i will never look like Brad Pitt, but at least I'm happy with myself and have no need to lie and pretend to be something i am not. Telling the truth and just being yourself is the key, and i know this is true because i have met some brilliant people at university.

I found this picture which i thought was very appropriate.
I wonder how many people know someone like Tim?


Boring stuff
http://www.howtotelllying.com/how-to-tell-if-someone-is-lying/14-types-of-people-who-are-most-likely-to-lie-to-you
http://images.google.co.uk/images?hl=en&um=1&sa=1&q=+lie&aq=f&oq=